


Jasmine and Gunpowder

by devilcuriosity



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-31
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-12-22 08:08:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11963259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devilcuriosity/pseuds/devilcuriosity
Summary: "No heroics," she had said to him once, her eyes glowing golden. He would take all of her with him when they parted ways, through the sprawling jungles of Cuba and the wasteland deserts of Afghanistan, across the endless ocean and limitless mountains, and he would survive. His country was counting on him.





	1. Visitor

**This story takes place during Operation Snake Eater at the Krasnogorje Mountaintop. Snake takes shelter in an abandoned building nestled in the mountain as he buys time before moving forward with his mission. An unexpected visitor will soon arrive but this time, she isn’t Eva.**

* * *

_Love is like de sea. It’s a movin’ thing, but still and all, it takes its shape from de shore it meets, and it’s different with every shore._

Zora Neale Hurston

* * *

**Chapter I : Visitor**

“What is it with some guys and their unnerving sense of dominance over women?”

“Maybe those guys are more complex than others.”

“I don’t know. I think they’re just spoiling for a fight.” A pause. “What about you, Snake? Anyone special back home waiting for you?”

“Can’t say that there is. There weren’t many people in my life to begin with.”

“Really? No girlfriends? Or—or lovers?”

“Nope. Just me and my good ol’ weapon collection.” He smirked as he pulled a cloth out of the shotgun and peeped through the shiny tubular body.

“Oh.”

Radio silence. He continued cleaning out the rest of his weapons, lost in the hypnosis of his repetitive motions, when he heard footsteps. He straightened up and held his breath, listening. Seconds later there was a loud _thump_ at the door. Snake pulled out the MK22 strapped to his thigh and pointed it squarely at the entrance to the room. Closing one eye, he guesstimated the angle at which the head of his enemy would appear in the next few seconds. He had one knee on the floor as he propped himself upright and steady. His radio was still on, just in case she had anything else to say.

 _One_ , he inhaled a sharp breath.

 _Two_ , the enemy continued thumping at the door, attempting to knock it down.

 _Three_ , the thumping stopped. He raised his head and stared at the doorknob, noting the 30-degree turn.

 _Now_ , the door opened and before the shadowy figure could look around, a tranquilizer dart was fired right at its forehead. It was a perfect shot. “Bullseye,” he whispered as the figure collapsed with an unfamiliar gasp. “What the hell?” Flipping the gun back into his leg strap, he walked over to the body on the ground. He turned it over to realize the figure was smaller and curvier than the ones he’d been looking at for the past few months. “A woman?”

He removed the dark hair that covered her face and peered over her complexion, looking down at her clothing to see where she came from. He noted her particular features before registering the familiar patch on her uniform. As she lay there with a tranquilizer dart jabbed into her forehead she was, in every respect, a strikingly beautiful woman. Her skin was pale like porcelain, and there wasn’t a speck of dirt on her face. He examined one of her hands and noted the faint and uninterrupted lines of her palm, lines that were free of marks and scratches. Whoever this woman was, she wasn’t doing physically demanding work. Nor could she have been a spy. This he was certain.

A moment later, he stood up and moved his spread of weapons from the cot to the small metal desk nearby. He carried her over and laid her down gently, careful not to meddle with the dart in her forehead. He’d take that out later. First, he needed to contact the Major. He took a seat on the chair beside the desk as the signal traveled across airwaves for a minute before Major Zero picked up from the other side of the world.

“Snake, is everything alright?”

“Major, I’ve got a… I’ve got a woman in my bed.”

“A what? Did you say a woman?”

“Yeah. She managed to pick the lock on my door. I shot her with a tranquilizer dart before she had a chance to look around and see me.”

“Bloody hell, Snake,” said the Major. “I can assure you that the woman is neither spy nor enemy. That’s Para-Medic.”

“What?” Snake spat back, confused. “What the hell is Para-Medic doing here? You couldn’t give me a heads up sooner?”

“Oh, stop being a baby. I was helping Sigint with his coordination controls and forgot to give you a ring about her arrival. She was supposed to check on your vitals to make sure everything was in order.”

“My vitals? What’s wrong with my vitals?”

“Do you remember those tranquilizer darts The End had shot into you during the last battle?”

“Yeah, his special rounds. I thought I fixed that when I took them out.”

“The old bastard is craftier than we’d care to think. Those darts were dipped in a stringent poison that will spread over time. I’m afraid you’ve got the lot of that poison filtering through your bloodstream at the moment.”

“I haven’t felt any different. What was the intended effect of the poison?”

“We recently discovered that the molecules work at glacial speed. It will take a few weeks for you to feel any effect, if at all. Para-Medic made clear that once the poison infiltrates your bloodstream, you will be paralyzed.” The Major paused for a moment, then continued. “As soon as we discovered this information, we immediately dispatched her to your location. We can’t risk paralysis, Snake. We need you for this mission.”

“So Para-Medic had to come here to physically treat the poison that’s filtering through my body?”

“Correct. However, your treatment has now been delayed because you’ve tranquilized her. You’ll have to wait until she wakes up.”

Snake growled under his breath as his gaze fixed on the figure whom the Major just claimed was the one and only Para-Medic. “Yeah… Sorry about that,” he mumbled.

“It’s alright,” the Major said lightheartedly. “Let’s be grateful it was a tranquilizer dart and not a shotgun bullet.” At that, the Major clicked off his radio and left Snake in silence with his thoughts.

While Snake had known Major Zero from previous missions with the CIA, he knew none of his other teammates personally. He never saw their faces, just heard their voices through his radio. However intense or meaningful those conversations were, people like Sigint and Para-Medic were shadows in his mind. Physically meeting someone on his team while on a mission was rare. His gaze traveled the length of the figure who lay before him, noting her untarnished camo suit and combat boots. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “Para-Medic, huh,” Snake said to himself after a moment, transfixed on the woman before him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m scrapping the assumption that anyone who communicates via radio has seen the face of the person they’re talking to. The radio is just a radio, without the ability to transmit images through fancy satellite technology. I think this makes for a more interesting connection between the characters.
> 
> After playing Snake Eater, I couldn’t stop thinking of how much I loved the nerdy chemistry between Naked Snake and Para-Medic. These two are more a match in their complimentary differences than people like Eva or The Boss are to Snake. I’d like to explore the emotional/psychological trauma of his past relationship with someone like The Boss to then illuminate the real love he shares with Para-Medic at some point, perhaps in a sequel to this story.


	2. Treatment

**Chapter II : Treatment**

Once the sedative substance infiltrates the bloodstream, the tranquilizer dart remains in effect for 15 minutes. For Snake, those 15 minutes make the difference between life and death, and whether he can get his hands on additional weapons and ammo. Frankly, he could do a lot in 15 minutes. After another detailed conversation with the Major, he was able to clear Para-Medic’s identity. Now all he could do was wait. It wouldn’t be much longer.

He forgot about the rest of his unpolished weapons as he sat and stared at the figure before him, a million thoughts running through his mind. There was still a part of him that remained skeptical despite the proof he’d gleaned from the Major. Who was to say this was actually Para-Medic? She could have been anyone. He was stationed in an abandoned building tucked away on the side of a mountain, deliberately concealed and undiscoverable. It took a very specific skill set to pin his location on a map. Either way, his best bet now was to wait till the tranquilizer wore off so he could interrogate her the moment she woke up.

Sure enough, the dart slid to the ground as she sat up dizzily moments later. It would take at least a few more minutes before her peripheral senses returned to normal. She raised a hand to her forehead and nodded slowly, as if nodding would shake out the drowsiness.

“I’d stay still for it to wear off completely,” he said from across the room.

Her hand dropped away as she looked over at him, confusion and annoyance roiled into one expression. She closed her eyes and stood very still, trying to meditate herself back to full consciousness.

“Damnit, Snake,” she moaned dramatically, taking another deep breath before mustering up her next comment. “Could you give me a minute before shooting a dart into my head next time? That hurt!” She massaged her a temple for a few seconds. After a time the blurriness cleared to the sight of the room, him seated by the metal desk and her on the cot across the way. A modest wooden closet stood off to one side while a weapons chest sat parallel to it.

“Tell me something,” he began before she could fully register her surroundings. “What operation are you part of, and what unit are you working under?” He studied every inch of her expression and movement as he waited for an answer.

“I’m part of Operation Snake Eater and I work for CIA, under the command of the affable Major Zero,” she replied with a smirk. “Snake, I visited you at the hospital after your encounter with The Boss during your Virtuous Mission. I also told you to eat that Spatsa mushroom, unintentionally making you sleep on the job.” She turned herself around to face him now, mimicking his posture and peering into his camouflaged eyes with a smile.

_ A beautiful smile _ , he mused somewhere in the depths of his consciousness as he pieced together her words. While he did everything to remain reasonably skeptical, the moment she exclaimed her discomfort by way of the tranquilizer dart was the moment he knew it really was the woman he’d been talking to for the past three years.

“So it is you, Para-Medic,” he said at last, rising and holding out a hand to help her stand. “Good to finally meet an admirer.” He looked at her with a cocky smirk as she took his hand and stood up to face him. She smiled amusingly as he steadied her.

“Thanks,” she said, both hands gripping his own, her senses rushing back to her. Once grounded, she headed for the door to fetch the lot of supplies left outside. Before letting go, he held onto her for a moment longer, forcing her to turn around to face him. He raised a hand to her face and smoothed two fingers over the spot on her forehead where the dart had been planted earlier.

“Hm,” he mused as he examined the tiny puncture.

“Any scarring I should worry about?” Her other hand was still entwined in his.

“Nothing permanent.”

“Good,” she said. His hand fell away and she looked into his eyes for the briefest second, their gaze locked to each other. He was a strange and alluring man, she thought, his dark blue eyes like whirling pools, the weight of their depths heavy and intriguing. She’d heard all kinds of stories surrounding him since she joined the CIA and yet here he was in the flesh, every bit as enormous and mysterious as the reputation that preceded him. Something told her he had no idea. Their hands were still clasped as they stood there, gauging the meaning of each other’s presence in the clamoring silence, inches apart. A second later, he turned away and let go.

A faint smile lit up Snake’s hardened face as he looked back at her. Something washed over her as she smiled warmly back at him, however uncertain of what just transpired. Then she remembered the task at hand. “It’s good to finally meet you, Snake.” She went to fetch her supply kit. “Take a seat,” she pointed to the cot in doctorly fashion, instructing he make himself comfortable. She placed her leather practitioner’s handbag beside him and pulled out disinfectant, a set of needles,  a vial of antidote, and bandages. “From what I’m guessing, it’s been about two days since you fought The End, right?”

He nodded. She wiped one of the needles clean with disinfectant before inserting it into the vial.

“That means the poison hasn’t spread yet,” she said as she looked at him thoughtfully, holding her first needle point up. “I’ll inject this antidote into three separate points on your body so that it enters the bloodstream from different directions. I’ll give you a shot on your arm, your lower leg, and your abdomen. This way it’ll circulate through your blood and take effect immediately.”

“Sounds like a plan,” he said as he watched her. “How much do you want me to take off?” She was in the middle of measuring out the antidote for the remaining two needles. After placing them neatly on a small tray, she looked at him.

“You’ll probably have to remove everything except your boxers. Or briefs. Or whatever it is you wear underneath.” He watched the blush creep up her neck to her cheeks, tinting her in a rosy glow. Something stirred in the pit of his stomach. He’d forgotten what that looked like. Meanwhile, she couldn’t catch hold of her thoughts. She recalled what soldiers like him wore underneath their kevlar suits; she’d researched the odd but nuanced topic in detail during her time as an intern. As Snake unclasped his belt in her peripheral view, she quickly began searching through her bag for the rest of the medical supplies.

“Would you like some privacy?” She asked stupidly as she heard the clang of the heavy metal belt drop to the floor and the subsequent unzipping of his body suit.

“I’ll be okay,” he said, pulling off the suit in one tug and tossing it aside. “Alright, I’m ready,” he said as he sat down on the cot, legs spread wide in his compression boxer briefs. She lay her tray of needles beside him once again and caught sight of his pectorals. Rather than eliciting base desires at his impossibly chiseled physique, she was caught staring at something her normal self felt to be incredibly private while her doctoral self knew to be years of history on the field reluctantly healed over time.

“My god, Snake.” Her hand involuntarily smoothed over the array of crisscrossed scars adorning his chest, her fingers following the trail down to his abdomen. She felt him quiver just the slightest as she stopped her trail. “I had no idea,” she said solemnly, her lovely face contorting into concern. Her hand seemed unable to part with his scarred torso as she stared at the strange marks adorning his body.

“I’ve collected them over the years,” he said gruffly, these marks a mere memory of worser times.

She smiled, nodding to herself and shaking away her dark thoughts. She continued examining the rest of his body the same way a general physician would. As she finished explaining the effects of the poison filtering through his veins, she held the first needle point up and ready. She leaned over and held his bicep in her small grip as firmly as she could, and injected the first round of the antidote. She pulled back, seated herself on the ground, and injected the second needle into the side of his lower leg. As the process continued, they could hear helicopters flying overhead.

“Remember what you asked me earlier? If anyone was waiting for me back home?”

“You still owe me an answer,” she nodded as she placed a circular bandage over the spot on his lower leg. She looked up with a smile. “Well?”

“My profession doesn’t leave room for love,” he said evenly. “A soldier like me can’t afford it, it’d be too much of a distraction.”

“I suppose,” she replied as she stopped to toss aside the used needles and check on the last one. “But love comes in different forms, doesn’t it? To love someone doesn’t mean being with them all the time or showering them with gifts. Loving is a selfless act, and you could love someone halfway across the world if you willed it.”

“I can’t afford to be selfless.”

“I know.” She looked at him uncertainly as she held the last needle. “The last point of injection will be on your lower abdomen, so I’ll need to get between here…” She looked straight at his leveled thighs, muscled and inviting, the blush swallowing her whole this time. She hoped he wouldn’t make her elaborate further. Without another word he spread his legs just wide enough for her to situate herself in between and inject the last round of the antidote. He was sizably gruff and warm to the touch.

“You could have just had me lie down,” he said as he watched her, leaning back to give her easier access. She shot him a glance as she sealed up the last shot.

“I couldn’t, actually,” she said with a smile. “The antidote needs to filter through your bloodstream at a pace I can keep up with. If you lie down, it’s too slow and if you stand up, it’s too fast.” He nodded. The helicopter was making another round across the mountaintop. “It must be hard for you to breath in those,” she said a moment later, glancing at his skin tight boxer briefs in bemused fascination. They were essentially designed to protect the entirety of his manhood under all circumstances.

“Only in the heat,” he smiled. “They’re useful, though. Not sure what I’d do without them.” He thought of all the times Eva attempted to seduce him but failed because of these very boxer briefs, for example. 

“I’m sure they have,” she agreed, patting his abdomen as she finished her ministrations. She took a step back and looked at her patient. “That should do it.”

“Thanks,” he said. “And Para-Medic?” She looked at him, her brow creased in attention. “No one told me how beautiful you were.” He smirked, hoping to break a laugh into her. Sure enough, she chuckled and then grinned, the ice finally broken between them.

“So you’re gonna tell me I’m beautiful and then what?” She asked as she placed the leftover supplies back into her bag. “Have you ever seen  _ Singin’ in the Rain _ ?”

He nodded a silent  _ no _ . “What’s it about?”

“It’s a musical detailing the career of one Don Lockwood,” she said. “What you said reminded me of a scene between the two main characters, Don and Cathy. He takes her to a studio and creates a perfectly romantic setting so that he could tell her how much he likes her.”

He'd grown fond of the bits of film trivia she'd shared with him in the last few years, and this was no different. He found that no matter what it was, he wanted to know what she thought. He liked hearing her talk about the things she loved.

“A romantic musical, huh? Didn't know you were into those kinds of films.”

“I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to see Gene Kelly dance. However many war films I've seen, I'm still a sucker for the romances.” Her eyes glimmered as she went on, a sight better than anything he'd seen in a long, long time. “Did you know it was the first film made in color?” She grinned at him as she recalled the scene she'd just described, nodding absently to herself.

“Para-Medic?”

“Hm?” She mused, starry-eyed, standing in the middle of the room. After a moment, she looked at him still situated on the cot.

“You think you could stay a little longer? I haven't had a real conversation with anyone in months.” He looked at the ground and then up at her uncertainly. His vulnerability took her by surprise and softened her altogether. In fact, the past few hours had sobered her up in the presence of the legendary Snake.

“I've got nowhere else to be,” she nodded with a smile as she made her way over and seated herself beside him on the cot. She felt an unexplainable pull towards him, as if she’d known him for a lifetime. She wrapped an arm around his and nudged him gently in the ribs, letting him know she was here to stay for as long as they could manage.

“Tell me more about that scene,” he asked as his gaze traveled from the unscarred arm wrapped around his to the wall opposite him. The feeling of having someone beside him without pretense was alarming and liberating and of all people, she was the only one he would've asked. He felt comfortable with her, more himself than with anyone else.

For the rest of the evening, she told him about all kinds of things happening in the world at large: current events unrelated to the war, the inner workings of filmmaking, the latest rock n’ roll records released. All things so far removed from his unforgiving world of risk and duplicity. By the end of the night, Snake had relished Para-Medic’s presence like a torchlight in the dark. He'd deal with the uncertainty of tomorrow when the time came but for now, she was here with him, and that’s all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love that Para-Medic is an absolute nerd who appreciates all of the finer things in life but wants to share the wonder and bring people into that world, not just keep it for herself. The world is a colorful, dynamic and marvelous thing to her, and she simply can’t get enough. She’s interesting, empathetic and intelligent. Her love of the world is infectious, and Snake is imbued with her fire, and loves it. He’s always loved it, from the moment they met through to all of the times she’d speak with him during missions.
> 
> My headcanon thinks these two have been in missions together for at least three years and while Para-Medic visited Snake when he was in the hospital, this is the first time he’s met her face to face. This way they get more history and it gives dimension to what they feel for each other.
> 
> I chose _Singin’ in the Rain_ because that scene was lovely, and it was something that popped into my head.


	3. Attachment

_In the summer_  
_I stretch out on the shore_  
_and think of you. Had I told the sea_  
_what I felt for you,_  
_it would have left its shores,_  
_its shells,_  
_its fish,  
and followed me._

Nizar Qabbani

* * *

  **Chapter III : Attachment**

The situation in Russia was bad at the moment. Colonel Volgin’s forces were head to head with President Kruschev’s army. The missions of all parties involved were delayed. On the ground, blockades were set up throughout the mountain region and they were sectioned off because of the fighting. Major Zero couldn’t swing by to pick up Para-Medic and Snake couldn’t move forward due to the blockades.

“If you love movies that much, why choose this line of work?” He asked one afternoon as he lay on the floor beside her on the cot. She insisted he take it but he refused, claiming that the floor provided better comfort to his back than the flimsy cot. She had one arm rested behind her head while the other fidgeted with wayward strands of hair. Her mind wandered before coming back to his question.

“Movies are what they are,” she said, her gaze out the window and beyond.

“How do you mean?”

“Movies are a form of art, a fantastical representation of just about everything. They’re nothing like reality.” They mused on her words in silence for a minute before she went on. “I wanted to do something better for society. Contribute in some way.”

“That’s why you’re aiding as my on-site medic,” he said with a smirk as he looked up at her. She returned it with a nod.

“Definitely. I thought if I could help my country during this war, I’d be doing something good for everyone.” She looked down at him. “I’d be helping guys like you,” she winked. He saw the blush creep up her cheeks as she caught herself, suddenly aware of her burst of flirtatious confidence. He wanted to laugh and reach out to touch her but thought better of it.

It was their third day together at the Krasnogorje Mountaintop. While they knew what problems the ensuing conflict had caused, the view from the terrace of their ruins was undeniably stunning. At sunrise and sunset, light streamed into the room and illuminated everything, making them forget where they were for those fleeting moments. Here in this desolate place, deep in the heart of a war they felt obligated to be part of, so far from home. Neither of them knew they had been wondering the same thing: what strange act of fate had brought them together here and now. It would have been easy to say their mutual indulgence was due to proximity. The past two days passed in peaceful cohabitation, sprinkled with intriguing glances, genuine conversation and a romantic shyness that would have made Venus herself blush. Yet underneath it all, they found in each other the unexplainable comfort of a kindred spirit, a complementary equal.

Of course, that didn’t stop her from feeling ridiculous, foolish even. Nowhere in her wildest expectations did she think she would be here with this particular man. She wondered if she might be another number in the long line of women in his life, somehow still justifying her warring emotions, standing by her decision in giving him whatever he needed despite the possibility of her being only a number. She would put her emotions by the wayside because he was bigger than them both and what he did mattered, and it mattered immensely to her. _Twisted logic,_ she thought wryly. Regardless, the last two days were illuminating. If everything she came to think and realize about the legendary Snake turned out to be untrue, she would leave her wits at the door when it came time to leave. She just knew that what she felt must have been true, and she hazarded a guess that he felt similarly. She had that, at least.

On the other side, it couldn’t be love, Snake thought, somewhat alarmingly. He had known her for two whole days if he didn’t count the three years they spent on and off together in missions via satellite communication. In reality, he spoke to her at least every other day for those three years. That must have counted for something. But in all his years on the ground, there was no love. For the millionth time, there would be no such thing for him till the next life. Even then there were no guarantees. He had no idea what he had been feeling in the last 48 hours but every time she was near, he wanted to be closer. He wanted to reach out and touch her, to be a part of her somehow. He wanted to……

He stood up slowly as he looked at her on the cot, his eyes glimmering with resolve. The wildlife outside hushed as the room fell quiet and she stilled, her gaze locked onto his, unblinking and uncertain. She dropped her feet to the floor as she rose to sit and look up at him. _So close_ , he thought. This was different. She was different from all of the women he’d known before. She must have been a dream. He must have been hallucinating. He got on one knee and came between her legs and held her face in his palm, his gaze still locked onto hers, intent and intrigue melding into one. She beamed, his touch sending a jolt of electricity to every nerve in her body. In that moment, they saw each other, and recognized each other, not for the first time but anew again. Then he leaned in to kiss her.

He was tender and deliberate, his lips softer than she could’ve imagined, tasting sweetly of mint and tobacco. His scent was a mixture of maleness and the lye soap that breathed into the cotton of his khaki shirt, thin softness hinting at the hard muscle of his body underneath. One hand held her face gently but firmly, while the other wrapped itself around her waist, bringing her in closer. His warmth and proximity brought in an affirming rush of emotion as she responded in kind, her fingers curled around the base of his neck, eliciting a growl from somewhere deep inside of him. He was every bit a lifelong fighter inside and out; every limb was lean and solid, his skin tanned from the desert sun and scarred from his life on the field. The solid enormity of his physical presence was only just beginning to occur to her as her fingers smoothed over his muscled expanses, this unwitting Adonis of a man. Each quiver she elicited from him sent chills down her spine. Every action and reaction sent a wave of pleasure to them both as they explored each other.

She was close but he wanted more - he needed more than this, if only to lend credence to what he had been feeling in the last two days. After a moment, he pulled away as he watched her breathing grow short, and smiled, tracing a finger to her lips, memorizing their lines for some greater purpose he couldn’t recount just then. He felt the warring pangs of longing, desperation and tenderness roll off him in waves as his hands roamed the length of her back and waist, as he fought the onrush of emotion and sensation that threatened to overcome him.

“What is it?” She smiled into his eyes, her armor melting away as his touch lingered.

“I don't know,” he nodded to himself, staring into the abyss of her amber eyes and attempting to delineate what this was, this irreversible forging, this inevitable union. He was confused and enraptured, fascinated and mystified.

“Snake,” she whispered, her breath warm on his lips. She leaned in and kissed him as tenderly as he kissed her earlier, returning his thoughts in kind, letting touch communicate where speech could not. She pulled away and looked at him, her eyes now like honey. She would let him come to her as he would, as he needed to. The heat resonated between them as they stood up slowly and removed the clothing off each other, their eyes locked in concentration. Deliberation and desperation danced between them as they fought to keep their growing need at bay. She saw his eyes roam the expanse of her naked body, illuminated by candlelight, and saw his hardening reaction. With any other man she would have shied away in her absolute bareness but this was different. He was different. She wanted him to see her, and vice versa. _Come to me,_ she beckoned wordlessly. He took her face with both hands and kissed her harder, allowing himself this moment, letting go altogether.

They were locked in hungry kisses as their hands explored new territory. Despite his rising heart rate, he was calmer now than he’d be in the last few days, the unyielding point of contact giving him comfort and assurance. He felt her hands roam down his back and cup his buttocks as her touch grew fevered and insistent, the heat between them rising. He held her in his arms as he kissed her from neck down to breasts, her nipples stiffening as she moaned with pleasure. At this he felt his skin tingle, every part of him lit like a match to fire, the intensity rising with each new sensation. He knew there would be no return when he gave in and let go. They moved back towards the cot as he sat down, her arms wrapped around his neck, her legs straddling his hips. His hands gripped her waist and she leaned back as he planted more kisses on her abdomen, feeling her quiver beneath him, making him ache in response, his need rising ever higher. When she rose back up she took him inside her, slowly and carefully, exuding a small gasp as they joined together at last.

They moved rhythmically as one, entwined in their pleasure, their souls suddenly melded and lost to the cosmos. They danced in a series of twists and thrusts to the ultimate moment of mutual release, at which point she exhaled a deep and audible sigh of satisfaction, nearly falling back before his hands spread across her back and brought her to him once more, housing her in his big arms, molding her body to his. He was a part of her as much as she was a part of him, forever joined. She nestled her head in the crook of his neck, panting and then quite suddenly, laughing. She could feel him quiver with the same response as they both came to the realization that they couldn’t let go of each other, that they didn’t want to let go of each other.

“Not yet,” she said between shortened breaths. She felt him grow still as he closed his eyes and let the tranquil silence of their surroundings sink in. He was warm and smooth inside of her, and she couldn’t part with that fire yet, not ever if possible. Some long minutes later, she reluctantly separated herself, coming back down to lie on the cot. As he made to get up, she caught his hand. “Come here,” she said tenderly, her voice low, her eyes misty. She was flushed with the glow of lovemaking, her cheeks rosy. She moved to one side of the cot so he could climb in beside her. As they molded to each other once more, she rested her head on his scarred chest, taking in the scent of him, and hummed something lovely for the both of them, lost in post-coital dreaminess. It must have come from one of her movies, he thought, smiling to himself. They lay together in the dimming candlelight, looking out the window, a million thoughts whirling around in their minds, both in an oddly hypnotic but grounded reverie.

They marveled at each other’s bodies, at the difference between them. Hers was fair and smooth like honeyed milk, he thought, not a mark on her, the dark of the hair between her legs standing in lovely contrast to her glowing skin, the pink of her breasts like flower buds. Her lips were rouged from his kisses, his fevered ministrations. Her cheeks were flushed pink, her amber eyes changing color in every light imaginable, rendering her ethereal and impossible. She smelled of jasmine, in her hair and on her skin. It drove him to near madness every time he inhaled this scent, intermingled with her desire. The beast in the pit of him growled every time he realized she didn't register the way she was, the things she did to him without even knowing. She was unaware of how beautiful she was and she would probably remain like that because it's who she was, superficiality taking a backseat.

Perhaps that's why she marveled just as intriguingly over his scarred and marked body, reveling in the enormity of him, and everything that made him the lethal soldier he was trained to be. When he stripped down to his naked body and explored every part of her, she felt as if she were being stalked by a panther in the night, one that came to gentler than she would've imagined but still rough and diffident in its longing. The blue of his eyes were set against the features of a strikingly handsome face, a darkly alluring man, the kind you couldn't look away from in a room, whose eyes burned like sapphires in the night. He would remain the same through the years, she knew, because that was also who he was. He thought she would flinch at the sight of his marked skin but she didn't know how else to tell him how much she loved that skin other than to adorn it with her own feathered kisses, her heated touch. She reveled in its perfect imperfection, finding herself aching to touch it again and again, his sun kissed skin and all of his strength and desire within. It was intoxicating.

“There’s a full moon tonight,” she said softly. A pause. She looked up at him in the paleness. “I'm reminded of a poem by E. E. Cummings... ‘Yours is the light by which my spirit is born. You are my sun, my moon, and all my stars.’” She smiled tenderly, her eyes full of recognition. He couldn’t help but smile himself as he bent down and kissed her soft lips with an affection he didn’t realize he had. There were many things he was just beginning to realize.

Her mouth opened to him again like the full moon tonight, soft and yielding. They explored each other once more as the world around them darkened, as the night grew cool. Their bodies spoke the volumes they themselves could not, affirming the bond they had felt with each other since their meeting days ago. Their reservations fell away as they held each other, both acknowledging the enormity of the sentiments between them, both understanding what may or may not happen. _To hell with this war and this world_ , Snake thought somewhere in the recesses of his mind. If tomorrow didn't come, he would die a contented man. It was the first time he and Para-Medic had felt this way about another human being, this intrinsic and transcendent recognition of another, and it was everything.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewrote this chapter so many times because these beautiful souls deserved a more poetic context to their moment of joining than what I initially had. As human beings in a “civilized” society, we take human connection for granted more often than not. Snake doesn’t have that luxury and in some ways, neither does Para-Medic. So when they come together, it means more than the immediate notion of physical intimacy. It means recognition, acceptance and understanding. This notion of “recognizing” another human being for who they are and not who you think they are. Recognizing the core of a person, the soul of that person. I think they’ve had that with each other and have always had it whenever they’d communicate via radio.


	4. Reason

**Chapter IV: Reason**

Her eyes fluttered open to the bright room, the makeshift canvas hangings barely blocking out what sunlight shone into the small space. She stretched her arms over her head and sighed wistfully as her eyes roved over the ceiling. She shuddered at the cool air that misted across her bare skin as the thin blanket fell away. Another shudder came when she registered the sound of his deep voice, bringing her to consciousness.

“Morning,” he said huskily as he bent down and planted a soft kiss on her lips, sending tingling shivers down her spine all over again. He had his camo trousers in one hand but was otherwise clad only in his boxer briefs. Her eyes roamed the expanse of his impossibly chiseled physique in the light of day, appreciating every line and curve that formed the presence before her.

“Good morning,” she said with a smile as she instinctively reached out and placed her hand on one thigh, the strength and hardness of it under her fingertips giving her goosebumps. “Did you sleep well?”

“Best I’ve had in a long while,” he mused as he pulled on his trousers, smirking as he saw her pull away reluctantly. He bent down and kissed her again, deeper this time, one hand cupping her chin. Then he sat on the cot in front of her.

“What was that for?” She asked, still half drowsy and caught off guard. He smiled. He was softer somehow, she thought. She was sure there were very few people who saw Snake put down his guard so carelessly. He seemed almost carefree for lack of a better word. She couldn’t help but smile.

“Everything,” he said. Again, she found herself mystified.

“I take it that last night was a good thing,” she said in a near whisper as she looked at him, smiling uncertainly. Her gaze then wandered over to the corner of the blanket that draped her half naked body, her fingers now toying with it for distraction. When she looked back up at him, she saw that his expression had changed, and he looked thoughtful as he stared at her. There was a flash in his eyes, whether of pain or sadness, she couldn’t tell. She felt her heart give way and grabbed his hand, squeezing in apology, cursing herself for thinking out loud.

“I’m sor—”

“It was nothing like that.”

“Oh.” Comprehension flooded through her. “I didn’t mean—”

“It’s alright,” he cut in. The room fell quiet.

“It’s not alright,” she countered, nodding to herself. “I assumed wrong where I had no business doing so, and I’m sorry for that.” She felt him stiffen in response as he didn’t expect these words. She went on. “I have no right to presume or judge you, Snake.” She bit her lip, ashamed and annoyed at herself for going so far as to actually believe all of the hearsay about this man when she should have left those biases at the door. He turned and looked down at her.

“People talk,” he began. “If it isn’t one woman, it’s several.” A pause. “I remember my early days as a rookie, when the older guys would give me advice. ‘Experience is everything,’ one said. ‘You’ve gotta rein them in like tigers, especially the ones you’ll meet.’ They’d howl like like a pack of wild dogs. From that time on, I didn’t take their advice seriously.” His eyes were hard as he looked ahead into nothingness, his fingers still entwined in hers. “You don't find love on the field. There's nothing in a war zone that comes close to that word, and there will never be anything like that out there.” A somber silence draped over the cool morning. They were still, allowing his words to sink in, for his thoughts to form. “In all the time I've been doing this, I've realized that that kind of human connection is beyond explanation, sacred in a way.” He looked back down at her, his mouth wanting to curl into some form of a smile but remained so. “When two people join, they're doing it for different reasons. Out of convenience or necessity, it's a bond they won’t forget.” His gaze seared through her like flames in an open field. “I don’t sleep with women so I can tally their names on a chart. I don’t do it to fulfill my soldierly needs either, though it gets tempting once a while.” He smirked.

“Why do you do it then?” Her fingers were dancing around his, memorizing the scars and lines adorning his weathered skin.

“At some point, I see the person without their guard up. I see them for who they are, not who they were pretending to be on the field. I’d find a way to take that part of them with me afterwards. It made my job easier, knowing I had a piece of someone.”

“We’re all human at the end of the day,” she mused, in tune with his thoughts. He nodded.

“In some ways, I’ve become dependent on the lives of others. Those real instances that I’ve shared with them – that’s what I remember most.”

“That connection keeps you going,” she acknowledged.

“No matter how far and wide you search, you won’t find a semblance of humanity in war,” he explained. “The longer you stay in it, the easier it is to lose yourself. I’d be lying if I said it was easy to stay the way I am, to still feel the way I do.”

He removed a strand of hair from her face and ran a finger down the side of her cheek, committing it to memory. She blushed and saw him smile ruefully, the hardness in his eyes dissolving into the softness from earlier. She sat up and threw her arms around him, squeezing him as tight as she could. His bare skin was soft and cool to the touch but the instant they touched, his warmth spread through her like wildfire. She felt his arms wrap around her waist just as tightly. She shivered, whether from emotion or the cool morning, and Snake tightened his embrace, covering as much of her as he could, shielding her, protecting her. He planted a kiss in her hair as she closed her eyes and committed the moment to memory herself, remembering the earthy smell of his skin, the indestructible feel of his strong arms around her. They both felt an odd sense of relief and contentment, their tight embrace grounding them and keeping them whole.

She began to hum a melody she had sung to herself whenever something overwhelmed her with emotion. Her voice was a whisper away but the notes somehow complemented the slow rhythm of his heartbeat. He closed his eyes, etching the melody into the vaults of his memory yet again. After a moment, she pulled away just far enough to look up at him.

“You’re something else,” she said, more to herself than to him. She felt her eyes moisten as she thought of him on the field through the years, alone in his work, taking bits and pieces of anyone he could just to remain human. It broke her heart. She would have given him all of her if it was possible. “You’re lucky I came to the rescue, you know,” she said, sniffling and laughing, feeling ridiculous but unable to stop the tears once they formed.

“You could say that,” he agreed. “But why are you crying?”

“I’m a mess,” she choked, laughing in between. “Tell me how you retain your humanity again and I’ll be on the floor bawling my eyes out. Ugh.” She heard a growling chuckle from him as he took her into his arms and planted another kiss in her hair. She pulled away again and composed herself just long enough to get the next words out in one breath before she fell apart again. “You don’t have to take a piece of me with you after this.” He meant to say something but she hushed him. “I don’t care if this sounds ludicrous – I’ll be at the end of any line, rope or satellite, as long as you’re there. You can take all of me with you at any time. Wherever you go, I promise to be there.”

“I can’t let you do that,” he said dutifully.

“I wasn’t asking your permission,” she replied. “Count on me, Snake. I’ll be there.”

He nodded, no words left in him. Then he thought of something. “What was it you were humming just now?”

“An old English folksong, of a man who meant to give his lover the world,” she said as she recited the lyrics:

_I will give my love an apple without e'er a core,_   
_I will give my love a house without e'er a door,_   
_I will give my love a palace wherein she may be,  
and she may unlock it without any key._

_My head is the apple without e'er a core,_   
_my mind is the house without e'er a door,_   
_my heart is the palace wherein she may be,  
and she may unlock it without any key._

“It’s a beautiful song,” he said as he thought of her. Of his growing fondness in hearing her speak, hearing her sing, hearing her make love, and hearing her cry. He felt the thrumming of his heart beneath his chest for the first time in a long time, and it was a mysterious but altogether sensible thing. It felt right somehow.

The rest of their fourth day passed in a blur of conversation and lovemaking, holed up in that room with nowhere to be. It was as close to pure bliss as they could get on the other side of things. At some point, she remembered to check on his vitals to make sure the antidote was working, which it was. “All of this has sped up the healing process,” she said sheepishly as she looked at the red marks on his neck and chest from just a moment ago. There he sat, radiant and adorned after lovemaking, nodding with a smile and listening to her as he was wont to do. This gorgeous man and his profound quietness, his inclination to listen and understand before all else. She was forever marked by the fact that he had shown her his true self, and vice versa. Whatever this was, was real.

The pact had been made, and they both knew she meant it. Despite Snake feigning stoicism, he was grateful for her promise. All it took was one special person to ease the pangs of loneliness and isolation. Para-Medic was his person. She was special. He would keep all of her with him wherever he went, for as long as he lived, if he could help it. He knew she meant what she said. On her end, she had no problem with the bargain. She would easily hound her superiors to place her on any mission Snake was assigned to. She would be there every step of the way. What kind of a world would she be living in, she thought, where Snake risked his life everyday, to have nothing in return? It was beyond that notion too. What they shared in the past few days was surreal and significant, and she would make sure she was there for him. It was as simple as that. Like the man who would give his lover the world, Snake could unlock her love without any key. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s great to have Snake talk about his past. This is something he’d do easily if he were with Para-Medic. Naked Snake is the most dynamic of his successors because he’s distinctly human – he’s got an unshakable core of empathy. His layered humanity makes him an intelligent man who gets the inner workings of human emotion. Or that’s what I’m telling myself as I write this love letter to Snake, man among men. My feels.
> 
> I’m certain my soul twin Para-Medic is also a renaissance/lute/John Dowland fan. That song makes me want to weep. Listen to the version sung by Andrea Scholl and if you feeling nothing afterwards, you have a heart of stone. :)


	5. Departure

_Where the blue moon shines,_  
_where the tears melt ice,_  
_in a sea of guilt,_  
_by the fallen stars,_  
_lonely chimes sing of pain._  
_There's a storm, only love remains._

 _I been stung by a star seed honey,_  
_he shone love like a lightning honey,_  
_I been hit by a star seed honey,_  
_his love burns like a lightning honey,_  
_I'm right here, I'm your starcrossed lover,_  
_I lie here like a starless lover,_  
_I'll die here as your phantom lover._  
_I never learn._

Lykke Li

* * *

 

**Chapter V: Departure**

At this point, Colonel Volgin’s forces were growing more desperate now that the stakes were higher. The tension came in from all sides and as a result, his soldiers were either particularly attentive or overwhelmingly dazed. The latter worked in their favor because these dim-witted soldiers were stationed on the mountaintop and had no intention of being as careful as they should have been.

It would have been foolish to think their time together would last. While they were fortunate enough to have been in each other’s company for an entire week without disturbance, there was still a war happening outside. So close, in fact, that it sometimes came right to their doorstep. There were many instances when a few knuckleheaded but dutiful soldiers thought of checking the storage units in the upper regions of the mountainside where they were situated, just to make sure they hadn’t missed anything. These moments were close calls and if Snake hadn’t taken precautions beforehand, he would have lost Para-Medic all the sooner. Those decoy items were finally serving their due purpose.

Snake didn't need a scope to see that the nearest soldier was pacing lazily in his stretch of dirt. He mumbled to himself often, complaining about inequality and his slim chances of getting promoted. He'd do this every half hour before lapsing back to silence. At some point, he stopped pacing, close enough for Snake to have a clear view of him. “Hmph!” He groaned, kicking up a cloud of dirt around him. _Genius,_ Snake thought dryly. He straightened his arms as he pointed the tranquilizer gun at his target, relaxed his shoulders, and fired. The soundless dart went into the side of the soldier’s head and he dropped on impact, caught by Snake as he fell backwards into the trench. Snake was positioned at one end of the trench on purpose; he couldn’t afford to have the soldier fall back and break his neck. Minimal dead bodies meant minimal suspicion.

Once he dragged the body to the quieter end of the trench, Snake began rummaging through the items on his person. “Hm,” he mused, his fingers roving skillfully over the soldier’s uniform. _Ammo_ , he noted as he found a few rounds for his Single Action Army shotgun. _What’s this?_ He pulled out a piece of parchment that turned out to be an old photograph with two figures standing together, their hands entwined around each other’s waists, a set of Zelkova trees standing sentinel behind them. They were beaming. Snake smiled as he tucked the photograph back in its place. Just as he finished up, the door to his refuge creaked open.

“Snake, what are you _doing_?” Para-Medic asked, her eyes wide as she saw the unconscious body in front of him. He looked up at her and then back around to see if anyone was coming.

“Get back inside,” he instructed. He scanned the immediate area again just to be sure as he wrapped up his looting. He heard the door tap shut as she secured herself inside. Despite the luxury of time the tranquilizer dart offered, there were still precautions to take. As he zipped up the last of the soldier’s uniform, he got up, heaved the body over his shoulders and paced down the mountainside to leave the body in an isolated ditch so that when the soldier woke, he would be disoriented and head back to the main campsite.

He returned to their room minutes later, making his way toward the rusty cabinet where he stored his weapons. As he was loading up his stock, he turned around and looked at her. “Replenishment,” he said as he waved a suppressor in the air. “These guys are getting closer now that the fighting’s getting worse.”

“Did that solider get a dart to the forehead too? Poor guy,” she asked, only half joking. Those darts were painful. He nodded.

“Better than a bullet to the head,” he concluded. Then he recalled the soldier's ranting about inequality in their ranks. “Volgin’s forces are getting restless. It won’t be long before he moves out of here.” He came and sat beside her on the cot. She took his left hand and curled her fingers around his, massaging them reflexively. They were warm from the sun.

“I can’t go back,” she said suddenly, thinking of Major Zero and Sigint, and her week with Snake. She nodded, trying to push the reality of leaving as far away as possible, her eyes focused on the ground, lost in thought. She felt his hand squeeze hers as he made her look at him.

“You have to go back,” he said, his voice softer than intended, his emotion getting in the way too easily. “I have to finish this, and I need your help.” At that, she looked up at him and smiled, her eyes reddening.

“I know,” she said halfheartedly, except she knew that Snake could finish just as well without anyone helping him, her least of all. Yet that’s who he was: supportive and empowering against insurmountable odds, a light in the darkness, his sorrow taking a backseat. Her hand came up to his face as she wove her fingers through his soft brown hair and traveled downwards, outlining his deep blue eyes, the scar that cut across one, his trimmed but still rakish beard, and then his mouth. _A stoic and alluring mouth,_ she mused before kissing it with a desperation she didn’t realize she had till now. He responded in kind, as he always did, reciprocating her feeling in equal measure, because no less would do. Their kiss deepened and lingered, and they were lost in each other yet again, hypnotized and mesmerized and unable to let go. Every point of contact meant a deeper connection being forged. After a time, they pulled away reluctantly as he smiled at her, a somberness drifting over them both, him moreso. Her heart felt like it was splintering in two.

“Will you be alright the rest of the way?” She asked helplessly as her hand smoothed over the back of his neck reassuringly, easing his pressure however much she could.

“I will be,” he said as he rested his elbows on his knees and looked ahead. Then his hand found hers again and he held onto her. “This past week—”

“—was everything,” she finished, unable to stop herself. She saw him smile uncertainly and cleared her throat, preparing for the worst. “I know what I’ve done and I know how I feel about it,” she began, “and if you feel differently, know that you owe me nothing. To have loved is something I’m grateful for, and I’ll go on supporting you wherever you are, because that’s how I feel. It’s okay.” She suddenly looked crestfallen after reasoning it out in her head, all without his thoughts just yet. He wanted to laugh but refrained.

“Okay?” He asked.

“Yes, okay,” she said, perfectly somber.

“I feel the same,” he said in so many words, and leaned back in to kiss her. He brought her into his arms afterwards as he felt her release a long sigh before her small bouts of shaking had come. Tears of happiness this time, he thought.

“I’ve stained your shirt,” she said as she drew back and wiped the last of her tears away.

“It’s okay,” he said as he looked down at her with a knowing smile, watching her as she watched him, inches away, arms still wrapped around each other.

“You’re more real than all of the legend that precedes you,” she mused.

“I could say the same of you.”

She laughed at that. “I don’t know about that. But I do have an idea to bring mobilized medical care for soldiers on the field. Maybe it’ll take off someday when all this is done.”

“It’ll happen,” he said without doubt. She was brilliant, elsewise she wouldn’t have been stationed alongside him throughout the years. That much he was sure of.

“What will you do after this?” She asked. Before he could answer, the radio in her leather sack was beeping. She looked at him and ran over to pull it out, twisting the dial to clear the static and receive the transmission on a private channel.

“Para-Medic, do you copy?” A familiar voice said.

“I’m here, Sigint. What’s going on?” Her gaze rested on Snake as they listened.

“Right on!” Sigint exclaimed triumphantly. “Good to hear your voice. Things were looking bad a few days ago which is why we couldn’t get a signal over to you guys. Luckily, Volgin’s forces are getting tired of his shit so they’ve eased patrols on the mountainside.”

“Which means?”

“We’ll be sending a chopper to get you within the hour. Hang tight.”

“What about Snake?” She asked stupidly, forgetting that he still had a mission to complete.

“Snake has his orders,” the voice of Major Zero cut in clear. Despite the static, his tone was indifferent. “Pack up and be ready. We’ll be there within the hour.”

“You there?” Sigint cut in a second later, his voice low.

“I’m here.”

“I’ll stall him as long as I can,” he said. _Click._

She turned off the radio, tucked it into the sack, and began tidying up her things. There wasn’t much she brought with her except the leather satchel filled with medical supplies. She hadn’t touched this bag since the first night. She looked around the room for things to dispose of but to her utter dismay, the place was spotless. Crushing reality had sunk in too soon. She was leaving within the hour regardless of how long Sigint could stall. They could steal minutes and hours but the fact remained that they would part soon. She stood up and walked around the room, refusing to meet his eyes, until she felt a hand on her arm, stopping her in place.

He turned her around to face him, his hands on her shoulders, firm but gentle. She wasn’t getting away, that much he made clear. His touch was seared into her memory, igniting the fiery beast inside of her all too quickly. If she looked into his eyes, she would be lost. She was quietly panicking, the same way she had always done, throughout all of the difficult moments in her life, and yet none of those moments compared to this. After a minute or two of gathering herself, she took a deep breath and let it out as she looked up at him. His blue eyes were smoldering, dark pools of swirling currents that threatened a great storm to come. She felt the unwanted and annoying onslaught of tears welling up, compensating for the sensory overload that was overwhelming her.

He pulled her into his arms and secured her tightly so she couldn’t move. He wouldn’t let her go until he was ready, until they were both ready. As they stood there in silence for what seemed an eternity, she wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him in closer, her desperation and longing stretched taut. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, and let the tears fall in silence, trembling in his protective embrace. She felt him waver for a second, and felt as if the ground beneath her feet would give way, as if some great beast had woken from its slumber. She felt his arms tighten around her even more, holding onto her for dear life.

How could she let go of him now, when they had known everything there was to know about each other? How could she wake up tomorrow and know that he was lost to her, that there was no guarantee of life or love? These questions whirled around in her foggy headspace, and they were inconceivable. She told herself she would be strong and would take everything as it came but this was a different thing entirely.

He felt her hiccup and sigh as her tears slowed, as she grew tired and spent. She looked up at him, her face swollen. He wiped her rosy cheeks clean. “I’m sorry,” she said groggily.

“Shhh,” he hushed her back to the crook of his neck once more, unable to say anything that would bring her comfort. For the first time in 10 years, he had felt the pain that cut inwards, straight into his core, the part of him that was armored against all outside forces. There were no more words left to say, only what they felt here in this moment. The time left was so short. Anything he could have said would have stolen these precious seconds away from him. Having her in his arms, where the silence was serene and not deafening, he understood everything as clear as a summer night. He understood more than he’d ever guess.

But what could Snake do?

_“You’ll have all the glory to call your own,” Major Zero said to him. Snake nodded in disagreement, blowing out a puff of smoke from his cigar. “Are you telling me you don’t want to be a hero for your country?” The Major scoffed._

_“That’s just it,” Snake said. “This isn’t a hero’s mission, Major. Let’s be honest.”_

_“Your words, not mine. Just remember that we’re counting on you, Snake. You’re our only hope.”_

_“I’m your best weapon, you mean,” Snake replied, laughing darkly at the stale realization._

_“Something like that,” the Major finished indifferently._

The memory was as clear as day. It was the one thing he seemed to recall now that he had been holding onto Para-Medic with an urgency that grew with each passing second. He smiled bitterly to himself, remembering her face the first time he saw it. He knew she was different, and that she would mark him. Not a superficial scar like everyone else but an imprint deep within. It was hard to come to terms with a realization like that, and in so short a time. All the same, he still had an objective to finish and this fact cut him open like a fresh wound. He breathed in the scent of her, and wanted to throttle a thousand wicked souls. She smelled sweetly of jasmine and gunpowder, the softness of her entire being fitting to his like the sea to its shore, an equal complement of immeasurable perfection. He felt her heartbeat thrumming mercilessly beneath her chest as she fought for control. And now to let her go, to see her fly away from him, to return to where he was the week before this one, seemed completely absurd. Everything suddenly became unnecessary — all of the past and current work he was doing, and all of the future. None of these things would give him Para-Medic. Nothing would return her to him, and stay there. There were no more thoughts left in him, just the soul of the person he had come to know too well in the last few days. _Too well_ , he thought darkly.

So words were left to those who would speak them. As the chopper circled overhead, the reality of the situation overruled everything they had experienced within the past week. There was no more delaying this moment of separation, so sudden and violent. She looked up at him, forlorn, and it took everything in him not to run out and shoot down the helicopter, the lives of his comrades be damned to hell. He wiped her face clean one last time as he kissed her eyes and then her soft lips, and felt the spasm of pain that threatened to swallow him whole but somehow still armored him in his most difficult times.

He felt Para-Medic tear herself away from him as she ran out the door. He followed her out like a lone wolf, and watched her catch hold of the ladder to the chopper. She turned around and looked into his eyes one last time, her amber gaze glowing golden as she told him everything he had already known. _I love you till the end,_ she said wordlessly, as she rose higher into the sky. He then caught the gaze of Major Zero, his face expressionless and unreadable as ever. Still, his eyes spoke all the words Snake had known just as well. He nodded to the Major before turning around and walking into the shadow of the next mountain pass, leaving everything behind in one fell motion.

In the same way he had coped with every challenge and tribulation in his life, Snake was running now, closing the distance between him and his target, and finishing what he started. He had a mission to complete, and his country was counting on him. “No heroics,” she had said to him once, her eyes bright and her smile clear. He would take all of her with him, through the sprawling jungles of Cuba and the wasteland deserts of Afghanistan, across the endless ocean and limitless mountains. There was no one around to see the legendary Snake smile as he continued forward.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bleary-eyed. There was no other way for it to end. A happy ending wouldn’t have made sense (then again, who has sense when in love). Perhaps someday in the distant future, these two will reunite, and it will be manifest beauty in its truest form. I’ll love them till the end.
> 
> Thanks for reading.


End file.
